This past week was a trying one in our family. It started out routinely with work and school. I started my second Whole 30 on April 1st and all was well. I even have three people doing it with me this time so that’s extra encouraging. None of those three people are living in my household, but hey, I’ll take any support I can get. Anyway, back to the trying part. Tuesday night, my youngest son started coughing a little bit before bed. We didn’t think much of it since that’s pretty common for him. We gave him some zyrtec and sent him to bed. Normally when he starts coughing and it’s unresolved in a day, we start him back on Singulair but we were out of it so he didn’t get any that night. The next morning he was still coughing but that’s not all that unusual either. We gave him some more zyrtec and delysym and sent him off to school. When I picked up my son after school, I could tell that he wasn’t breathing normally and he had just woken up from a nap which was unusual for him. I needed to go to his doctor to get a refill of his Singulair and it was the closest medical facility anyway, so I left my other two kids with their grandparents and rushed off to the doctor. Once I got to the doctor and sat my son down on the counter, I could see just how labored his breathing was so I asked the staff to please see my son even though we didn’t have an appointment. They agreed to…probably because I was crying at that point and probably also because I said I’d leave with him to go to urgent care but I didn’t think it was safe.
My son’s oxygen levels were reading at about 85% and wouldn’t stay higher than that even after two breathing treatments and a steroid injection. So, we ended up at the Emergency Room where my son had three hour-long breathing treatments and IV magnesium to try to relax his muscles. Even after all of that, his oxygen was staying around 87% unless he was on oxygen. So, my son and I took a ride in an ambulance to the local children’s hospital where my son was admitted to ICU. Very long story slightly shortened, he was diagnosed with asthma and spent two nights in the hospital. It was very eye-opening to find out that the minor symptoms he’s had for so many years were actually signs of something more serious and that we could’ve been relieving his symptoms more efficiently all this time. He’s doing much better now although still recovering. We’re very grateful for his recovery and for the tools to prevent such a severe attack in the future but we are also left with questions and wonderings. This leads me to the point of the post…
Today in our church service we had a guest speaker who was speaking on avoiding offense. One of the portions of the Bible he referred to was the story of Gideon. The portion of the story he mentioned was one I wasn’t very familiar with. The story of Gideon is one of my two favorite stories (the other is the prodigal son) and God is continually revealing new things to me through them so I went home and decided to read it over again and pay attention to the verses the speaker had referenced. I started reading the story and didn’t even get to the part I was looking for before I saw this and my attention was drawn away from the original goal.
Judges 6: 12-14 (emphasis added)
When the angel of the Lord appeared to Gideon, he said, “The Lord is with you, mighty warrior.” “Pardon me, my lord,” Gideon replied, “but if the Lord is with us, why has all this happened to us? Where are all his wonders that our ancestors told us about when they said, ‘Did not the Lord bring us up out of Egypt?’ But now the Lord has abandoned us and given us into the hand of Midian.” The Lord turned to him and said, “Go in the strength you have and save Israel out of Midian’s hand. Am I not sending you?”
When trying times come, it’s so easy to ask “WHY?!” It’s so easy to get confused about who God is and why bad things happen when your reality doesn’t line up with what you think it should be. It’s easy to be tempted to demand an explanation and refuse to be moved or use until you have it. Throughout our hospital stay, I was frustrated and the thoughts came to be angry and offended that this would happen to MY CHILD. However, alongside those thoughts was the truest thought that GOD IS GOOD! I don’t know why this happened to my son and I don’t know why even worse things happened to the other kids that we saw in the ICU but I do know that God’s word is true and that He doesn’t cause bad things to happen. I also know that God wastes nothing and this thing that the enemy would like to use to destroy my son and all of us in the process will actually be used against the thief when we use this experience to help others and lead them to Christ.
Have you ever noticed how many times in the Bible that the people doubted or were scared and God pretty much ignored it and told them to move on? One story was of Gideon but also look at the disciples when Jesus went to Heaven after the resurrection and return.
Matthew 28: 17-20 (emphasis added)
When they saw Him, they worshiped Him; but some doubted. And Jesus came and spoke to them, saying, “All authority has been given to Me in heaven and on earth. Go therefore and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all things that I have commanded you…”
The disciples had doubt but Jesus didn’t address the doubt. He didn’t soothe them and reassure them in who He was or what their calling was, He simply ignored the doubt and gave direction for moving forward. I’m sure there are many more stories just like this in the Bible but I’m not looking them up right now because I’m going to get back to reading about Gideon before dinner. 🙂
Remember this though, if God is in you, you are a new creation. Let’s not waste time trying to figure out why things happen when we could be out there just living for God. God does provide comfort, in fact he is called the Comforter, but He knows the best way to provide and sometimes an explanation just won’t do it. Let Him comfort you in His way but don’t let the wonderings and questioning keep you in a loop of no production. Don’t let the enemy deceive you into just spinning your wheels. If you are mad, tell God that and let Him help you through it. He knows how you feel anyway so no need to hide it. He is your Father and He loves you beyond measure. His answer may not be what you think, but that’s the case with earthly parents and children too. Sometimes I answer my kids and provide for them and limit them in ways they don’t understand but it is still for their best interest. Get the path forward and just go.
God is good! The End!